I quit this cleanse. It has turned into something that, for me, is not healthy. I love the idea of it and I mostly love the results but it is not worth it to me. I have always been an all or nothing person, and that has been my downfall in many ways in my life. It has taken me years to learn that there is a middle ground and it doesn't have to be all or nothing, but I still struggle with that outlook sometimes. That perspective has been nothing but trouble for me...in the past it's led to binging and restricting and all kinds of other bad things. With this cleanse, I have done wonderfully for the past 2 weeks. The other day when I was struggling I managed to stay focused and I didn't even go off plan at all. But the strictness of it is really messing with my head and I don't like that. I am tired of the food choices (or lack thereof..which is partly my fault as I am picky and don't care for fish, etc.), and bored with my meal plans. It's gotten to the point where I only have a few bites of my meal because I'm so bored with it. So I just stop eating it and go on with my business. Which is leading into bad habits for me and it's causing me to dislike the healthy food that I was doing so well with before I started this cleanse. For example, I am so sick of plain salad with grilled chicken that I don't even want to THINK about eating a salad, even WITH a little cheese, a couple croutons and a little dressing...which is what I would have had before for a meal and I would have absolutely been in heaven (and is perfectly fine for me to eat). It is making me crave things that I haven't even missed since I really started getting healthy on my own the first of the year. My body is CRAVING food that on this plan, I can't have. I don't know if it's that my running is trying to burn carbs that I don't have (I've been running 3-4 miles 3x a week now at least! woo hoo!!) or if I'm getting too much protein but my body is not happy. I weighed in this morning at 202.8 which is fabulous. I am really happy with that, but it is not much better than I could do on my own, as I've consistently lost around 2 lbs a week since the beginning of the year. I measured this morning and I have not lost more than 1-2 inches, which astounds me. I am totally stumped on that one. The results aren't even the issue though...it's what's going upstairs that concerns me.
So I had a LONG talk (i.e. therapy session haha) with Jami this morning and we decided to call it quits with this 24 day challenge. I am SO thankful for her (and Aaron both) because she really helped me talk through things and helped work with me to realize what was the best choice for me, my health and my body. I am proud that I made it 2 weeks and I will definitely keep using the products because I really do love them! But foodwise I need to go back to my own healthy habits I was establishing and find that middle ground again. I was feeling really low thinking about stopping, and being embarrassed that I couldn't make it through, especially knowing I was going to have to come here and post about it, but it is the right thing to do for me. I want to be clear....this is a great cleanse, a great plan and I am positive that it would be awesome for lots of people out there. There is nothing wrong with the plan. And I am really sorry if I have disappointed anyone or let you down. It's just that for me, with my mindset, longterm goals, and especially my history, it just isn't the right choice for me. I am proud of the habits I have built since the first of the year and I am looking forward to getting back to that. I am excited to be excited about healthy food again! :)
This has been a really good (and humbling) learning experience for me. I'll definitely be using some of the plan's ideas in my own journey going on....like drinking at least a gallon of water a day, eating several small meals (I've never been good at that one!) and having protein with every meal. I have 41 more days before the final weigh-in for my 90 day challenge, and I'm really pumped to kick it into high gear for these final few weeks. I feel spiritually, physically and mentally the best I have felt in years and I am so excited for all the possibilities this journey holds!
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3 comments:
It sounds like a very good decision to me!
Not disappointing at all! At least not to me. I think you are doing a wonderful job. You have to find what is best for you and it sounds like you are on the right track to getting there. You are doing great!!!!!
Thanks you guys. I really appreciate the support...I feel so much better having made that decision. Thanks for being so encouraging!! You guys are awesome :)
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